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Finding my way in the World~ Through a Dance with Cancer,Yoga + Reiki
I feel that I am drawn to Prana Flow through vinyasa in my body. I have always done yoga since about age 19, and move through poses that I intuitively do, then later to find out that it was a ‘real’ pose. I have began a path of study in the Prana Flow style from Shiva Rea with Adri Kyser, RYT 500 one of Shiva’s few (less than 10) master trainers in the world. I began this journey in 2011 after completing my 200 hour Registed Yoga Teacher in 07-09. I taken several modules with her as one of Shiva Rea’s teacher trainers. I love vinyasa flow yoga. It makes me feel so alive and present. I share yoga with as many people as I am so fortunate become exposed to, and have facilitated many huge community yoga classes and Texas yoga events. I know that I am drawn to bring yoga teaching and ultimately Prana Flow on a global scale. I am honored to hold space for this teaching.
I continue my regular studying from the books of the masters and their students. I study the Yoga Sutras, the Bhagavad Gita, cable into Ayruveda, would like to learn Tantra, Prana, and deepen my knowledge of vinyasa with relation to the traditional style of yoga. I have studied Reiki in the lineage of Usai for over 12 years and regularly hold Reiki Healing sessions for private clients in our Spa. I also believe I am to hold space for women, Goddesses, to come into circle and meditation for transformation, and planetary change. We began a Goddess Reiki Angel Circle in fall of 2011 and meet regularly. I am called to share the attunements of the Reiki Energy passing this gift onto others, and teach the lineage to whomever in my path is drawn to this healing art.
I have practiced yoga off and on for around 20 years. For the past 5 years I have studied intently and with focus on teaching. My personal asana practice has totally transformed over the last few years, and I love the challenge of arm balances, inversions and long holds. My background before yoga was in the hair and fashion industry as a hair color educator / trainer and Cosmetologist. I love being of service to others, but the fashion industry was just not resonating with me after I had my first child in 1998. I began a path to organic eating and wellness. I immersed myself in information and was truly shocked and amazed at what I was learning, so began sharing my knowledge with everyone I knew.
Then, in 2000 my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer as a recurrence from a 16 year remission. She had stage 4 Cancer and was in the hospital with a chest tube for a long time. Then chemo and radiation was the normal path in medicine. She opted in. I was appalled to see what was happening to her body, but her spirit was AMAZINGLY POSITIVE. She is truly my inspiration. She and I decided to get attuned to Reiki Level 1 and 11 in 2001. She used the Reiki energy to relax and go deeper into her study of the bible. I utilized the Reiki energy to send her distance healing and love and light every night. I also utilized the gentle healing power Reiki after September 11, 2001 when I had a young hair client in New York who experienced Ground Zero. She was suffering from anxiety and insomnia. I helped her by sending Reiki into a ‘box’ for her to ‘open’ anytime she felt herself needing love and light.
I changed my schedule to be closer to my mom and came by as often as possible. After my second child in 2003, visiting became even more important. My father cared for my mom daily and she continued to improve. Then she would suffer another ‘dance with the big C’, it was metastatic, so always something new. My sister and I didn’t like her traditional doctor, and after visiting the Oncologoist’s office one day with my aunt and Nana, I was fed up. The Oncologist said to her, “Well, Lorene, at the end of the day sometimes we just run out of options. You have taken so many chemo and radiation treatments and, frankly there is nothing more I can do.”
I felt ANGER welling up, even now as I write I feel that trying to come back, after long ago working through this. I am now able to see that doctor for her limitations. At the time, my mom was so weakened by that statement that she BELIEVED it! And my Nana and Aunt too were nodding their heads in agreement! I felt like jumping over the table and shaking that doctor! What the Crap! No, no way. I was not going to let her or them believe that BS!
I called my sister immediately and she was like ‘HELL NO, Im not accepting that’. She began adamantly researching alternative treatment options; I did the same. My belief in ‘modern medicine’ was forever tainted.
We both found the same doctor through different avenues! Dr Dicke at Arlington Memorial. He is the most brilliant man I have ever met. He is a non traditional Oncologst, branching form MD Anderson, but using even more radical approaches. he has two nurses taking notes as he diagnoses a treatment plan for the patient. He and his innovative staff kept my mother alive and happy, living a fairly normal life, for an additional 5 years. We went to scrapbooking retreats, she came to the kids parties and events, soccer, which my hubby coached. She said she didn’t believe that old doctor and, ‘ I have too many more soccer games and dance recitals to see” and was not ready to go just yet!
She spoke to thousands at the Race for The Cure in Tarrant County and encouraged hundreds of people at American Airlines, where she worked for 12 years, to do the Race with us. She reached so many people, sharing her positive encouragement and her story. We raced from 1996- 2000, then again in 2004 pushing a stroller with my baby girl. That last race I clearly remember her speaking to a sea of pink host and shirts. She always had a flair for the dramatic (gee, wonder where I got that quality). That year in 04, she was the guest speaker after the Race. She was just recovering AGAIN from chemo and felt really good. As she went onstage she had her hand painted cane and her wig with her. During her speech the crowd was cheering and clapping with her enthusiasm for life and she THREW her wig and dropped her cane (she didn’t need it then) and the crowd wend wild. I was so proud of her and to be her daughter. Shortly thereafter she was invited to go to Washington, DC with the Susan G Komen president to meet the President of the United States, George W Bush, and attend a gathering at the White House. I still have her autographed tee shirt and all her Race For the Cure Posters that she won for best corporate sponsor for four years.
In late 2007 I began my path to yoga teaching. I felt after all I had experienced, doing hair just didn’t make sense for my path, and began truly feeling called to healing, wellness and ultimately yoga. I researched many teacher training programs online and found a module based program that would fit into my busy schedule of soccer, dance and helping my husband in our family business, The Fish Physician, designing and maintaining aquariums. I enrolled in the 200 hour program and began Level 1. In early 2008, I enrolled for Level 2, and was booked to go to Austin. Just a fews week before I was to go to the training she fell and broke her hip. She had surgery and was in rehab at a nice facility in Arlington. I had created a Fish Physician route gaining clients around where she lived and had treatment so I could see her often.
I visited her one afternoon when she had a little party her friends threw her at the rehab center. She always maintained a very tight group of women around her circle. This is essential for us as Goddesses. She had a quilting bee and a group from American that regularly had lunch that that called the SISTERS. Sisterhood is a part of who we are as women. If you have not found a group of women, keep seeking. We need you. Every woman has love to contribute in a Beauty Way, and I learned this with my mom and my sister, and watching and participating in my mom’s groups. These sisters, these Goddesses, were the ones that stayed up all night praying, these women were the ones who drove her places when my dad could not, and they were the ones who brought her gifts and states with her and supported her in every hospitilization.
After the rehab center, she was scheduled for a routine port flush and she contracted bronchitis in the hospital, the details are all discombobulated. I remember that she was remitted again and she got a lung infection. She went to ICU and CCU again. She was recovering nicely after a huge scare and I came by to hang out with her in her hospital room Thursday before going to my teacher training, and we watched TV. She had a respiratory therapist going in regularly and she would give 110% every time she had to blow up that little bag to count her lung capacity. She couldn’t talk well due to her throat being raw from the tubes. We did some word search puzzles and I snuggled with her, and we just spent quality time together.
I left for Austin for the Conference and yoga training level 2, staying with my BFF from high school was a lovely needed time for recovery. I learned about different learning styles, and got into my personal practice, doing Surya Namaskar (Sun Salutations) with my eyes closed, feeling the asana in my body. I had a chiropractic adjustment during my stay at the conference with a naturopath and he literally moved my organs back into place. Throughout all anxiety and long nights the lower (root an sacral chakra) organs had literally bunched up in my abdomen. I felt a huge release and was so grateful for the time I had been gifted for myself.
I came back Sunday and my family said we needed to go straight to the hospital! I was shocked, and we jumped in the car. I questioned why they didn’t call me, but they said she took a turn for the worse and I could not have done anything from Austin anyhow, they didn’t want to worry me. As soon as I walked into her room she locked eyes with me and would not look away. Everyone and everything in the room disappeared except for her blue eyes. She could not talk, could not sit up but was totally coherent at that moment. She TOLD me she was ready to go. I walked to her and held her and looked at her and asked, Mom are you telling me you are ready to go? She breathed Yesssssss. I had to look away. I wanted to be strong. I left the room eyes welling up and pulled my dad out of that space into the hall. I told him, “Dad, she told me she’s ready to go, she doesn’t want to fight anymore.” He said, “Aw, No, honey, she’s a fighter, she will pull through.” I said, “Not this time, Dad. She is ready. You need to let her know it’s ok. She’s waiting on us to let her go. She needs to know its ok. I already told her it is ok.”
My kids had no idea why Nana couldn’t talk, or what was truly happening, but I was glad that they could spend a little time with their Nana. We had to leave soon, to get them ready for school the next day.
Wednesday, May 07, 2008 she went into the light.
My life since then has done a complete 180 degree turn for the greater good. I now devote the majority of my energy to helping other people through yoga, Reiki, Meditation and healing therapies. I began teaching over 9 classes a week and developed a wonderful student base. I started my clients on a membership so they could go to any class that I taught at any of my locations that I rented space from. Spirit had a bigger plan. My family is totally supportive of my career. I have become involved with many local charitable organizations offering FREE yoga as an organizer, board member and emcee and host.
My local teaching schedule had become very busy, and I was teaching 4 weeknights and Saturday am, and three mornings in three different locations. One of the places I taught was a Zumba building and the owner had requested a meeting with me the before Thanksgiving of 2010. I met her at Starbucks. She was also in her other jog, a Chamber of Commerce President and had no time to run another business. She was ready to let her Zumba business go under unless I took it over. I don’t teach Zumba, and only had one class per week there, but I listened to my intuition. She was a newlywed, and her hubby was pressing her to give it up NOW. I had a week to decide before she stopped paying rent and closed shop.
I meditated on this, I had much peace about moving on with this dream of owning a studio because I felt like the timing was not right back in 09. As this opportunity was staring me in the face I felt so so happy. I knew this was the time, and talked to my husband long and hard about it. I listed the pros and cons. I decided YES! YES! YES!
So I opened Yoga 4 Love with a pre grand opening Holiday Market Party in the beginning of December 2010. I knew that if there was any lapse of time in the space closing that the current clientele would not have any trust in the new ownership, so I just jumped in with both feet and did what I do best. I threw a HUGE party. We got all over the local media and had an awesome turnout. I invited many vendors and they all had booths for their products. We had demos and food and a great pre opening. We had a huge membership sale and sold a bunch of memberships all to begin 1/1/11 for our opening. Through this event we raised enough money to pay for our remodeling of the building from a warehouse to a beautiful new studio. Im May we added the flooring.
We have added a full time spa and massage room called Dragonfly Spa, held meditation circles and Reiki attuement ceremonies as well as HOT yoga, Chill yoga, Donation based yoga plus still offering Zumba dance fitness and Zumba Toning as well. I recently began working with an intuitive Lifecoach, Gary Quinn. I have learned so much about myself and the law of attraction. I have also begun offering lifecoaching for my clients via Skype.
I am very grateful for the opportunity to serve my community and my members. This all began with a dream, an inspiration and belief. Bringing higher intention and positivity into my daily life through meditation and connection to nature keeps me grounded. As I find myself flying so high, as I am naturally drawn to do, I balance myself with my meditating and personal chakra alignment in my Reiki practice.
I continue to desire to make a daily change in the world through my talents, my time and my offerings of service. Everyone has a voice and a place for making positive change, whether its in their own life, their kids, the local community or through globe activism.
Go… Find your voice!